My name is Lindsay and this is just so I don't feel guilty for not keeping a written journal...


Tuesday, September 27, 2016

Something has happened to Brenda


The norm, for the past 8 years, was to just mention Halloween to Brenda and suddenly our world was all aflutter.  Decorations went up just days after the new school year began.  Different costumes were brought to school nearly every day of October.  Conversations all revolved around candy, pumpkins, parties...  You get it.

Something has happened to Brenda.

I blame Katy Perry.

I fully acknowledge that childish-Halloween ended, for me, after I was twelve, as it does with many kids.  BUT.  This wasn't supposed to happen to my kid.  Hey!  What's autism for, if not to let me enjoy my kids' youth a little longer than normal???

She hasn't even glanced at the decorations that Suzie and I put up.  She shrugged and mentioned she'd wear the costume she used at girls camp, when asked.  When bringing up her birthday, she just lets me know what she wants from the store.  No talk of her annual Halloween/birthday party that she's obsessed over for nearly a decade...

Nope, she just wants to play video games and listen to her "girl pop".

I feel helplessly robbed.

So to lash back, in justified, parental vengeance, I'm going to expose Brenda for the child she is.

Last month, I took Brenda, Suzie and two cousins to the movies to see Finding Dory.  I was parked right outside the small theater as they came out and could see that Brenda was struggling to compose herself.  The (spoiler alert) happy ending had completely brought Brenda to sobbing, gasping, tipsy tears.  She declared it her favorite movie that she would never watch again.  ...Now she's asking for the dvd for her birthday...

getting in the car post-movie

How does this expose her as a child?  Um.  I guess I'd have to call myself a child after sobbing at the end of North and South (the one based on the book by Elizabeth Gaskell, not the war movie).  But my movie is adult.  It has adult stuff like history and death and philosophy and politics and relationships...  and I sobbed in the privacy of my dark bedroom.  And and and..  And Dory is silly and cartoon.  ...nevermind the family and love and courage...  Oh, and I cry at the end of Wreck it Ralph.

I feel my argument crumbling.

Well crud.

My kid is growing up. 



Wednesday, September 7, 2016

the family death grip


 Anton Ego (Ratatouille):

"In many ways, the work of a critic is easy. We risk very little, yet enjoy a position over those who offer up their work and their selves to our judgment. We thrive on negative criticism, which is fun to write and to read. But the bitter truth we critics must face, is that in the grand scheme of things, the average piece of junk is probably more meaningful than our criticism designating it so. But there are times when a critic truly risks something, and that is in the discovery and defense of the new. The world is often unkind to new talent, new creations. The new needs friends. Last night, I experienced something new: an extraordinary meal from a singularly unexpected source. To say that both the meal and its maker have challenged my preconceptions about fine cooking is a gross understatement. They have rocked me to my core. In the past, I have made no secret of my disdain for Chef Gusteau's famous motto, "Anyone can cook." But I realize, only now do I truly understand what he meant. Not everyone can become a great artist; but a great artist can come from anywhere. It is difficult to imagine more humble origins than those of the genius now cooking at Gusteau's, who is, in this critic's opinion, nothing less than the finest chef in France. I will be returning to Gusteau's soon, hungry for more."


I've always loved that part in the movie where you hear Anton's critique.  The other day, as I was loading pictures from my brother's wedding onto my computer, Anton's voice came thru from the other room.  It doesn't exactly apply here but something about the awesomeness crossed over.  I even teared up, which is not much of stretch for me.  ...but I felt it. 


I love my little bro. and Saturday was an extraordinary experience that left us all in awe with goosepimples o'plenty. 


 Why was it so extra special?  Because he's my baby bro?


Because Allyson is ridiculously fun and we are going full-on family deathgrip?


 Maybe a little of both?


 Maybe because Mike and I looked awesome...




 Or because my forever first family is complete?



 
I don't know.  ...Why analyze it?


 So I'm just going to set all these pictures here...


...and walk away, smiling. 


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