Suzie 8.0

I just found pizza crust stuck to the underside of my keyboard.  No wonder it was wobbly.   

...Thanks Garret.


So.  When upgrading from your 7.0-Suzie to the 8.0-Suzinator keep in mind that the 7.0 model is still intact.  Basically, she's just bumping her Suziness up 12.5 percent.  This will be apparent mostly in sound levels, energy, temper, sweetness and Nutella-intake. 

The upgrade process itself will require a few additional downloads including: 3-little-munchkins, ice-skates, chicken-nuggets and cookies.

Download cookies HERE

The following day, when checking out your new 8.0 Suzie, you may be surprised to find that the upgrade is still loading.  You may want to just set aside your entire weekend.

Now here's the big deal about Suzie 8.0-


She is eligible to be baptized into the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints.

Don't forget this part.  Don't forget how she smiled and was reverent, even when nervous about being in the water.  Don't forget about her hugs and soft/shy comments.  Don't forget how your brother shared his testimony of the Holy Ghost, and how the room was filled with friends and family.  Don't forget how your prayers were answered with calm kids and safe travels in a snowstorm.  Don't forget the joy, peace and love.

Enjoy it.  Remember it.  Love it!


Love you Suzie 8.0.

suzination

So I called Suzie over to the computer, showed her these pictures and asked her what she would like the post to say.  She said I don't know and I immediately typed that phrase.  Seeing this she starts to cry.  I clear the script and tell her we can come up with something fun.  She cries harder from the pressure.  I close the page and tell her not to worry, we could go play a game instead. 

She picked Snake Oil and, of course, she beat me.  (Playing Snake Oil with just two people doesn't work traditionally but we've made alterations that make no sense.)  After that Brenda suggested we play dance-attack.  Having never heard of this I asked her what to do.  She stood across the room and started to twirl ballerina-like.  Making her way towards me she suddenly punched me.  Not too hard, but definitely by surprise.  "Dance Attack!"  Suzie, having witnessed, was in.  She started prancing and I was suddenly kicked in the shin. 

she enjoys a certain app

It was giggles all around but I had to teach the girls WWF style fighting.  After we settled down I again asked Suzie about the blog post.  "Any thoughts on what we should write?"  She shook her head.  I asked if I could write about when she.......   She laughed and said That would be gross gross GROSS! 

...loves it, actually

So I don't get to write about somebody tooting in the bathtub?

My point is that I like this girl and I want her to share her thoughts. 

I just went and asked her what her favorite part of today was.  She said Disco Head which, she explained, is some game where you stick your head out of your tent. 




...BTW- We went camping.  It was fun. 

...I should post about that when I get some pictures...

leaps and bounds

A...

...is for  

ANGRY!

It's been an adventurous 7 months of shared-home preschool for me and the other two moms!  I'm not great with little kids.  They're too ...unreasonable.  But I can muster up the cute teacher inside and put on an educational playdate ...sometimes.

At least I have pictures that seem so...

 The letter F!

Oh.  Well.

...We're working on it!

fabulous

Suzi has been insisting lately that she intends on having just 5 more birthdays (emphasized with 5 fingers) then stopping at age 10.  "Just like Brenda" she says, "...I don't want to be a grown up."


Brenda does make 10 look fabulous...

Bringing up Baby

5 points to anyone who gets the title!


So Suzi has turned 5 and I am done with babies -as I remind her regularly.  She's throwing a fit and I say "Silly Suzi!  You're not a baby anymore, are you???  Babies don't get ice cream and have to take naps!  Are you ready for your nap??"  Sometimes, this works.  Sometimes she will pause from her whining and say "Oh, so I don't cry anymore?  ...Do I get to go to school now?", and she is sufficiently distracted from her woes.  And I win haha.  (Of course, I've been doing this since she was 3.  She still has tantrums.  ...I should write a book on parenting.)

But 5!  My baby!  A princess party was requested which meant pink cake, pink decorations and pink accessories.  I only have a few pics, but they are priceless.

JUST DANCE-

THE PRINCESS AND HER POSSE-

HER HIGHNESS (between frustrated sobs because "I DON'T LIKE PICTURES!")-

So yeah, she's awesomely awesome and she's awesomely MINE!

Happy birthday Suzi!

clarity

Mommy?

Yes Suzi?

When I have a birthday party will my friends come?

Yes

Oh, because they are my friends?

Yes

Oh, and they like my party?

Yes

Oh, and you'll call my friends?

Yes

Oh, and you'll call my friends today?

No, your birthday is after Christmas

Oh, because this birthday is for Brenda and Garret?

Yes

Oh, because Brenda and Garret are having a birthday?

Yes

Oh, because it's Brenda and Garret's birthday?

Yes

Oh, it's not my birthday yet?

Not yet

Oh, can I go to Garret's and Brenda's birthday party?

Yes

Oh, can my friends come too?

No, but your cousins will be there

Oh!  Because they like birthday parties?

Yes

Oh, because we're having a birthday party?

Yes

Oh.

...

...

Mommy?

Yes?

Can we touch noses?

protege

Suzie, in her never-ending attempts to do everything with and just like mommy, has taken on a new hobby.

"Watch me Mommy!" she shouted as I pulled my running shoes out of the closet.  I watched her race around the living room after which she, with heavy breath, exclaimed, "I'm a runner, JUST LIKE YOU!".  When she saw that I was very much impressed she ran to her room where she donned her favorite dress.  "I'm ready to go running with you Mommy!"

So, excluding the formal apparel, I think I have a copycat.

For anyone having a bad day out there-

Suzie's got my phone again...

This post brought to you after sifting through over 300 pics discovered on my phone.

weird science

Driving the girls home from the grade school science fair-


Me: So girls, what was you favorite part of the science fair?

.
.
(long pause)
.
.

Brenda: I like zombies.  Zombies eat brains.

Suzie:  I like fairy princesses.  ...and dinner.

.

Me:  ...Alrighty then.

rebel

I spent a good portion of today singing ACDC's "Back in Black" which was really mostly just shouting da da and ya ya because those lyrics are nearly impossible to understand.  When the kids showed signs of annoyance I just sang louder.  I mean hey, I listen to their Blues Clues, Aquabats, and Cat in the Hat videos.  Most the day I'm hearing "MOOOOM!"  "I'M HUNGRY!"  "I WANT JUICE!"  "GARRET IS BREATHING ON ME!!"  "SUZIE NEEDS A TIME OUT!"  "BRENDA WON'T PLAY WITH ME!!!"

So I find little ways to rebel.

I wasn't a rebellious kid growing up.  I wouldn't say I'm a rebellious person now.  Growing up I could watch my older brother push the limits and it was easy to see how that never really worked in his favor.  I have the type of personality that likes things peaceful and fun and simple.  Limits and proper authority figures were concepts I never had a problem with.  They provide me with a bubble of safety and direction.  So that's me.

But.  I do find pleasure in defying society in little ways.  I like to drive fast.  I like loud music.  I like saying CRAP.  I like giggling with my friends through Walmart like we're 13.  Some days I like leaving the house ungroomed just to prove I don't have to please anybody.  I like eating cookies before dinner.  I like setting housework aside to play on the computer.  Heck, I'll leave wet laundry in the washer overnight 'cause I'm bad like that.

It's not much, but it gives me balance I guess.  I have that sense of being my own person while still being the good person I want to be.  (Too many be's in that sentence- take that grammar.)  I should be embarrassed perhaps, that I'm in my mid-30s and I'm blasting Aerosmith in my dusty minivan.  But I'm not.  I'm pretty content.  Dare I say that I think I'm pretty cool?

Suzie has nailed this move BTW

I can see Suzie getting her sense of self as she just has to do things her own way.  She'll stay within a reasonable, obedient limit, yet she is determined to add her own flare.

Me: Suzie, sit down here so I can help you with your shoes.

S: I will sit over there and you will help me with my shoes.

Me: Suzie, it's time for bed.

S: OK mom?  I'm going to bed and you're going to lay down with me and I want ummmm GIRAFFE with me NOT elephant today and I'm going to take my sippy cup, 'cause my sippy cup is for bed time and you don't say no.  ...Don't say no mom.  OK come on!

I don't think we're so unique.  I think we all have a little stubbornness to set ourselves apart from the norm.  Even if it is a little lame...  'Cause I'm BACK IN BLACK!!!  BAP!  DA DA BAP! DA DA BAP!  NEERNEERNEERNEERNEERNEEEER BAP! DA DA BAP! DA DA BAP!...

Yes, I realize I'm a dork.  But I'm having fun and that's what's important, right?

woman power

Lately the simple chitchat includes the question 'How's life with the kids back to school?'.  I shrug and mumble, s'good.  But I'm really thinking- 'My number one companion is a 3-yr-old who might win our manipulation war.  ...help me.'. 

growth (the good kind)

I'm going to do this post like I've been staying caught up all along.  Like everybody knows everything about anything that's been a happenin' here the last while...  And if I refer to the awesome family reunion with a wink, you'll already know how awesome it was and wink back.  And if I sigh about Girls' Camp, you'll sigh with me.

So we're all up to speed then, right?

OK then.

Latest in the news is that Suzie is joining the ranks of the potty-trained.  Yes, she's been 3 for 8 months, but it was me who finally wised up and shoved Suzie into kid-hood.  The little attempts over the last year were half-heartedly given and half-heartedly received.  But there was nothing half-hearted about the way I danced and yelped and cheered around the house when hearing that delightful little tinkling.  Suzie is more enthusiastic about the sticker chart on the door than she is about the toilet.  That's not such a surprise really.  ...Stickers have animals and toilets smell.

"Mom?  Please hold my princess dress.  Mom?  Underwear goes on my bum?  That's silly.  Mommy?  I want 3 stickers.  Suzie get's 3 stickers now.  DOGGY STICKER!  LOOK MOM! DOGGY STICKER!!!!"

Now, I plan on flaunting this.  I have a kid that will be potty trained before starting school.  Before.  YEARS before.  And get this- I'm about down to just one child in a diaper.  ONE.  I haven't been down to one since the day before Brenda was born.  ...Brenda is almost nine.  NINE PEOPLE!  I'm seriously moving up in the world.  Perhaps a new hair-do is in order?  Is it time to start wearing saucy shoes or feathery hats?

Speaking of moving up in the world, I am proud to announce that I have successfully gardened a tomato plant.  ...Plant.  No tomatoes but the plant is still alive.  I did that.  Me.  Last year the poor plant didn't last 2 weeks.  And next year, with fingers crossed I will get the 2013 tomato plant to produce.  Yes I will and do you know why?

Because getting a few green leaves to cough up a tomato can't be harder than potty training.  It can't, right?

I might just be able to do anything.

"Hey millionaires!  If you don't have trampoline floors and a giant slide that goes from your bed to a pool, then give me your money.  You're wasting it..."

-unknown

A feast of leftovers

Today we went into the city and didn't die.

...which means another tally mark under my name.  (finger lick and sizzle...)

Sooooo,

Does your Garret flee out the back doors of the Lego store requiring you to weave through boxes and secret displays in the "employees-only" warehouse area at top speed?


Oh well I guess I've seen things you can only dream of...


Does your Brenda barrel into the doc's office with a confident smile and announce to the audience in the waiting room- "I'm ready for my check up!"?

No? 

(awkward silence filled with pity)


Hang in there Champ.


Does your Suzie laugh at you from the safety of her car seat while you chase the stroller across a wet, windy parking lot, saying upon your return, "Mommy, you so silly."?

Yes?  

OK, but does she then take a picture of you and call you pretty?

smirk

Yes, I might be a bit arrogant, but when your full time job is to basically keep three kids alive you tend to get a bigger head with each passing tragedy-free day. 

I just mushy-love these kids.

Like mother like Suzie.

If you were to sit and watch old family videos over at my parent's home you'd know that as a child I was blissfully unaware of my loud, shrill voice.  It was like a superpower that could bring down villains. 

Too bad there were no villains around, so it was just my parents who suffered...

I grew up and became quite sophisticated (yup) assuming I had grown out of my childish superpower.  That is, until a desperate turn at Catch Phrase where getting your girlfriends to say fluffernutter proved to be the breaking point.  "Ummm Lindsay?  You're really loud."   We laughed.  I apologized.  Our friendships bloomed and grew ...until they all quickly upped and moved away.

hmmm...

So for all the pain I've caused over the years it may bring comfort to know that Suzie is honorably getting revenge. 

Watch out villains...

You're going to be glad you read this...

The stretch marks on my belly look like spaghetti.

(See?  Paying off already...)

And no matter how many sit-ups, how many 10Ks, how many diets...  they are a permanent part of me.

You know how us mothers like to hold our 86+ hours of labor against our children as though they intentionally came into this world to torture us?

I could get so many more miles out of just "showing-off" my spaghetti and with a horrified look and a raspy voice say, "What have you done???"


So Suzie turned 3. 

I guess turning 3 is hard.

From cakes that must not be touched (?)
to insensitive mothers,

it's a real drag.

One might even fall to the temptation of the sippy cup.

Those of us who have been there can be a comfort to those less experienced.

If Garret could speak he might calm Suzie with a simple shrug and a, "Hey, aging just means that the candy on the fridge will be within reach soon..."

I say go ahead and be a diva on your birthday, Suzie.  Because just as this spaghetti-belly is permanent, you are too.  And there's nothing I can do about it. 

Well, I guess I could put you down for a non-negotiable nap and eat the rest of your cake...

Happy Birthday Little Miss Suzikins!

"When I turned two I was really anxious,
because I’d doubled my age in a year.

I thought, if this keeps up, by the time I’m five

I’ll be 64."

-unknown

lack of supervision?

Suzie's artistic expressions are expanding.

The explanation of her family portrait is...

..."Daddy, Mommy, Suzie, Mario.  HOORAY!!!"

spooks and aging

Because Brenda loves dressing up, and because Brenda loves Halloween, and because Garret doesn't mind as long as there's treats- we put on a Halloween-themed birthday party. 

***********

Brenda may have gotten her love for dressing up from me.  (Thank you Anna for the costume!)  Mike was my knight in shining armor.  (I officially knighted him after the disaster clean up.  Remember?  He deserved it.)

Honestly, I don't know what Garret's costume is, but he was comfortable and handsome.  

win-win

 Don't be scared!  This Darth Vador is only about 4 ft tall and wears pink underpants...

Suzie appropriately donned a clown costume.  That's a given, right?

The cousins and friends were scary and lively and pretty and exhausting!  (in a good way, of course)

 Bosom-friend, Darcy, wowed the crowd with a masterful creation-

Remember the cupcakes she made on my birthday?   ...I know, right?

And so we decorated pumpkins, put on skits, danced and tossed beanbags...

Oh how we partied...

Next year you're all invited.  (I say that now but a couple days before the event I was panicking at the thought of my house full of young'ins.  ...So we'll see.)