My name is Lindsay and this is just so I don't feel guilty for not keeping a written journal...

Wednesday, June 29, 2016


As I was watering my garden today (yeah, I do that sort of thing.  impressed?) I was wondering why poop dirt is good for plants.  That stuff is the body's rejected stuff and we're going to eat the results.  Oh yes.  We're eating this stuff so I can shout it from the rooftops.  I AM A GARDENER!

Tomatoes, cucumbers and potatoes.  I feel so arrogantly resourceful.  Like on Father's day I made a mixed berry pie.  From scratch, crust and all.  How immediately I assumed I was now a professional as the pie was perfection.  ...A week later I again pranced to the kitchen to sprinkle my pie magic.  It ended up crap and I was confused.  ?!  ...I'm ...not?  not a professional???  I hung my head and left the kitchen.  Back to the cereal bowl.

I love me some cereal.

Don't buoy me up.  Don't pat me on the back and tell me to keep trying.  I'm too distracted watering my GARDEN.  Did I mention I'm a GARDENER????  It's my first real try, in the ground and everything.  My other failed attempts were in pots and such. unprofessional.  We professionals get our knees dirty and our backs sore as we commune with mother earth.

I called my friend every few steps of this most impressive endeavor.

"Hey!  I've weeded!  Come see my dirt!  ...What do I do next?"


"Hey!  I got the compost!  I went with the chicken poo!  That ok?  ...What do I do next?"


"Hey!  HEY!  ...Do these things need water?"

 I took a personality test once that used questions to help you find your niche.  The question that broke the camel's back was "Do you ever wonder when you're going to actually grow up?".  I was type ONE!  Then the test told me that as a #1 I should embrace my ridiculousness and enjoy that part of myself.

So, soon you'll all be invited to enjoy my professional poo-tomatoes.  I'm pretending to adult.

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